As Trump Threatens Dept of Education, DOE reinstates the use of the word STUPID in Schools

Monday, February 10th, 6:30pm EST, WASHINGTON DC — President Trump today renewed his threat to close the Department of Education. As the name US AID was symbolically removed from the facade of their building over the weekend, the presidents threats to shutter the DOE became much more credible.

In reaction Monday, the incoming Education Secretary, wrestling mogul Linda McMahon, held a press conference about the issue where she made no comments about the role of the federal department she now represents, but tried on several new wrestling capes for the cameras.

In response to the president’s threats, outgoing Department of Education administrator, Ben N. Effectual, said that his last action at the DOE was to reinstate the use of the word Stupid in schools across the country.

“This is just plain Stupid!” Mr. Effectual said in his final DOE press release. “That’s why we’re now allowing students to say the S word again. It made sense to outlaw it a few years ago in schools across the land. Now it makes perfect sense to let them say it. Stupid, Stupid, Stupid!”

The word Stupid has been universally disallowed in grades k-5 nationwide in recent years as educators struggled to get kids to stop bullying. It also was thought by educators that students with low self-esteem would benefit from forbidding the use of the S word.

Linda McMahon, the new champion of the children, reacted swiftly, calling the DOE’s final act terrible judgment. “Is this what we want our kids to see? We might as well just teach them violence. We might as well punch and kick each other in front of them on TV,” said the former wrestling CEO.

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